“It’s all good.”
Please don’t respond to me with those flaccid few words. They’re limp and wretchedly without hope.
It’s a phrase not even worthy of being called insidious. Insidiousness implies some cunning or shrewd planning has taken place. This phrase is void of any such strategy. It’s an effortless slide away from response-ability.
It’s like serving a bland pasta dish with no seasoning, no delicious sauce. It’s only effect is to turn one away.
“It’s all good”. It’ll likely be followed by a recanting of a schedule of dire busyness.
Okay…so you get it. I don’t use “It’s all good”. But I’m not innocent. Sufi teachings gave me observation skills. I check my feelings and actions while I’m with others. I catch myself lapsing into bouts of self-imposed busyness. I need reminders that I set up the schedule and can change it. I don’t want to be serving friends bland, cold, sticky pasta.
Today, while tossing this about, Reverend Victoria Stafford came to my attention. She popped my senses like an exquisite dish of finely seasoned pasta smothered in a perfect sauce. She shared concepts that prove she understands. She decried insipid phrases in a most expressive manner. She helped me reconsider my mission. She reminded me to respond – to work at finding good words to express my wanting to be a gourmet friend:
“Our mission is to plant ourselves at the gates of Hope – not the prudent gates of Optimism, which are somewhat narrower; nor the stalwart, boring gates of Common Sense; nor the strident gates of Self-Righteousness, which creak on shrill and angry hinges (people cannot hear us there; they cannot pass through); nor the cheerful, flimsy garden gate of “Everything is gonna be all right.” But a different, sometimes lonely place, the place of truth-telling, about your own soul first of all and its condition, the place of resistance and defiance, the piece of ground from which you see the world both as it is and as it could be, as it will be; the place from which you glimpse not only struggle, but joy in the struggle. And we stand there, beckoning and calling, telling people what we are seeing, asking people what they see.” – Victoria Stafford from her book, The Impossible Will Take a Little While: Perseverance and Hope in Troubled Times/
Now may I grow into her eloquence.